Today’s world is busy promoting the satisfaction of the ‘self’. We are constantly reminded through social medias and any other type of media to think about ourselves and not mull over things and people which give us stress or annoy us. We are told ‘be yourself’, however what if the being so is a form of nuisance to the other person, as oftentimes the other person getting the brunt of someone’s bad manners is I, Me, Myself. Then it is totally not COOL. Life is definitely not about being stuck- up as a stubborn mule. Its all about

• Learning
• Unlearning
• Re-Learning

To be honest, social etiquette are often bound by the culture and territories. However politeness and consideration is universal. Well, all the more some of what I write will arise from my experiences as a parent. You are welcome to oppose them!

1. Let’s start from the beginning , shall we? Thinking on paying that friend a visit who is mostly buried under loads of work owing to her  little children and zero  help. Its always a better idea on giving them a heads up rather than crash landing at their house. Saves a lot of embarrassment at times. Not to forget they might simply not be available, saves you all the trouble too! Having said that in certain cultures its totally cool as well, so know your call. (see cover photo)           
2. Try being a little punctual. But of course getting your kids up, about and ready is no mean feat but you can do it when you just start early         
3. When invited for a dinner  try showing up  with a small gift likesome chocolates or home-made dessert rather than empty-handed. However if every time it is a 100 dollar Starbucks card then unconsciously you  may be causing your host a dilemma . Remember most people return favors. Inviting you to their house should not be a expensive affair for them until your friend is a high flying socialite. Then it is totally cool!
4. Hello? Do you mind putting down that gadget when someone is talking to you. If it is so difficult then why not stay at home..eh?
5. Now that you are all warmed up and ready to talk your heart out. Can I remind you of a golden rule please. Please refrain from asking intimately personal questions like ‘when are you getting married?’ and ‘when are you having kids?’. You simply have no idea what they are going through in their lives. Yes, go ahead and bite your tongue , please.
6. Well you are talking from your heart, you are with friends after all but please spare a thought for others, they might have something to say as well. Prevent your conversations from being perfect monologues and please Do not be a douche bag!
7. When in a group avoid whispering. If you love whispering sweet somethings in the ears of your favorite friend try playing Chinese whispers!
8. When someone is talking to you about their hectic life or some tragedy which they are trying to overcome. Please don’t rush to tell them, ‘It happened to me too,” or “you should listen to my story”, sometimes all someone needs is a shoulder to cry on.
9. Do not over-indulge in taking selfies. It depends a lot on the nature of the group you are with. If it is a formal do its going to be a tad too uncomfortable for others if all you can think of is gathering perfect selfies to upload on social media.. Remember studies are telling selfie is a form of mental illness. Need some more discouragement..?
10. Coming to Children, they intrinsically have a different level of energy at varying stages. No need to be bitchy if you spot those kids scampering through your house. That’s what kids do unless you were born yesterday.
11. Although if you want a little peace or disapprove of it either do not invite the little things or provide them something to keep them busy or assign a corner of the house with some safe toys and craft to keep them engaged.
12. If there is something you fear may get vandalized such as precious artifact make arrangements to secure it before anyone arrives. Same goes for things like crayons if you fear some mischievous kid might color your favorite wall with it . Just remove the damn thing rather than crying over spilt milk.
13. Always keep some food for children. Not every time will kids prefer the spicy food that you relish. Try keeping some options for the kids as well such as nuggets and cheese pizza. Always helps to have the kids fed and engaged.
14. Do not force feed other peoples children with stuff that the actual parents opposed. Respect the rules set by parents. Their is surely some thought behind it.
15. Do not criticize anyone’s parenting techniques. It is outright rude.
16. Do not give unwanted advice. This is one of the most annoying things that you can do. Trying to help your friend is one thing but telling them what you should be doing every time is telling  them you are smarter.
17. Do not use your spouse or kids or any other family member as a  as a butt of all your jokes. Remember you have to go back home!
18. Always keep cleaning equipment handy.Avoid making your guest feel unwelcome for dirtying your carpet. Do not get flustered.
19. Be first aid ready.
20. Do not get involved in kid fights. Their is a reason why they are kids, do not be one.
21. Teach children  thank yous and please, please. It helps to be polite. At the same time practice the same as well!
22. Listing out your children’s merits and achievement does not sound too modest, unless someone asks for it.
23. You are hosting a party and you love the meat. However do not assume that everyone is a  hard core meat eater in your gathering .Their may be someone who is a vegetarian. Provide an option for them too or it can get awkward. It always help to be aware.I know that my husband is, a vegetarian!
24. Do not waste food in a party. the food looks way too tempting and you simply lost account of how much you wanted to eat and how much you actually ate.
25. Lets talk a little hygiene, find a sneeze coming (they often do out of the blue, at times) and you do not have a tissue at hand, simply sneeze in the cranny of your elbow, never in the palm of your hands . Remember you are going to be using that a lot , while shaking hands or eating and what not. This way you do not pass off the infection 🙂
26. Help to clean the litter until the host has a barrage of help at their beck and call.
27. Being a guilty or under confident host can kill all the excitement out of the party.Most important is a happy host.Also we like people who are cheerful and positive and shun those who are sulky or gloomy most of the time. Do not feel positive, simply fake it , it works. Remember, Happiness is infectious.Having stated all this I must clarify that most of the things I stated above are subjective. What is required is that you use your sense of judgement to realize the behavior which is suitable to your culture and environment. Whatever you do be yourself  and be considerate to others too.   While you are doing all this please do not forget to enjoy yourself as well..Happy Socializing..Keep Smiling ! 🙂