Of scares and of thrills

“Fear comes with imagination, it’s a penalty, it’s the price of imagination.”-Thomas Harris

Did you ever face a problem where your child is suddenly afraid to stay in a room all alone?They are only comfortable when they have someone around them?Well this is about my 4 year old daughter.To start from the beginning we have just shifted countries and started a new life here.Surely our little one is grappling with the changes.However it was only after about 4 months of our stay that some new behaviour symptoms began to surface in her.She has started expressing intense fear of things.Initially we had put her bed in our room so that she could feel secure next to me.However she started getting up and waking me up at nights rather timidly mostly teary asking me why the door of the room is not closed.She would be quiet inconsolable saying something was lurking there in the shadows.Despite all our vain attempts to calm her somehow her fear would not recede.So we began closing doors.

It did not end.One night I remember waking up with her crying that ‘someone’ is standing in the room.All our efforts to convince her that it was nothing but a shadow failed.She was quiet hysterical about it and deeply convinced of her suspicions.It was only when I got up and switched on the light that she relaxed.However I was alarmed.Situation was getting dismally aggravated.She would be in any part of the house as long as one parent was there with her or she would not hesitate to ditch her favourite T.V show or any activity that she was doing.She refused to even go to the loo unescorted. If I told her I was busy she would reply,”I will wait till you finish Mama.”I must mention that she is also learning to cope with an addition to the family.Now to my surprise she is totally cool if her baby brother is in the room.Once I even overheard a conversation which went like this-

“Dont worry new baby ,I am not going to leave you.”

“Goo GOO Ga Ga”

“I will save you from the monsters.God will also save you.”

“Aggu”.

Now whenever we go out she is quiet adamant about taking her teddy friend along with her which I would not usually mind but the one is quiet an old raggedy one.Although we are totally cool about it.

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Now to deal with all the chaos in my own life I decided to pick a few books for those rare peaceful times.I really wanted to read the much hyped ‘The Girl on the Train’ by Paula Hawkins.So when I came across this book I simply grabbed it.

TGOTT is a psychological thriller,with a first person narrative style.We hear the story through three different female characters in the book-Rachel,Megan and Anna.The story begins with a narrative by the eponymous,Rachel Watson who everyday travels by train from Ashbury to Euston at 8.04 and back by the train which leaves at 5.56.Now Rachel is as told to her by her mom is blessed with an ‘overactive’ imagination.During her journey,the train stops at a faulty signal about halfway through the journey almost everyday.It is there that she enjoys looking at one of the many houses along the rail tracks which is inhabited by a couple whom she names Jason and Jess..It is on one such course that she notices something about them which was out of the usual and immediately after which something transpires.The primary reason behind why she gets involved was because she was an alcohol addict,had just undergone a failed marriage and also been fired from her job.For her getting involved into it was a way to feel important.
The story unfolds slowly ,bit by bit making the book quiet unputdownable.Be prepared to be distracted from whatever work you have at hand.It took me about 2 days to finish this novel of about 493 pages.Just the urge to know a little more about the multi-layered story kept me going.
Talking of characters ,it would be difficult to decide which character was more twisted.Every character in the book is either a drunkard , pervert ,husband snatcher,cheater or plain liar.Each portraying to be something they are not.The writer places numerous red herrings  at regular intervals.The book is full of suspense and carefully guarded secrets.However midway for someone seeking to get answers it may begin to get tedious.I would not hesitate to draw comparisons of it with an american T.V drama of the 90’s called twin peaks as it also was based on similar premises and had some twisted characters of its own as well although the latter was tinged with supernatural and surrealism as well.

If you are a fan of suspense thrillers and enjoy the likes of Gone Girl then this book is for you.

Now talking about the problem of my overly imaginative girl I did my own homework and even discussed it with a therapist.What I learnt thereon was-

1.At around the age of 4 children are developing a hyper active imagination due to which they often begin to imagine threats to themselves of the unknown.

2.One cannot reprimand them for their fears as it will only aggravate their problem as their fears are very much real so just play along with them.

3.They sometimes draw strength from some toy or stuff , they like to carry around.So that is perfectly normal.

4.To monitor her T.V viewing habits,thats where she is getting most of her ideas from.

5.Their is no way you can talk them out of the fear so just let time take its own course.

Certainly I do not stress about it too much.Although at times I get really furious when she acts too paranoid about it but I try my best to keep calm and if I am unable to do so I try to make it up by cuddling her later.It  really is not such a ‘monster’ of a problem after all.I shall let time change her,hopefully for the better.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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11 thoughts on “Of scares and of thrills

  1. Interesting . Actually most of us do face such strange behaviour of our kids at this tender age.
    I agree with the fact that this fear or strange act is due to kid’s hyper imagination power.
    My 4 years old son was crying while watching a movie when there was a sad scene, It took me a while to make him understand that this is not real. However, impact of watching TV or a movie is tremendous on him……
    I am not worried about this but it is scary. I guess with the time things improve and kids come out of hyper imagination ability.
    So no need to worry much but keep an eye on this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. absolutely these days media is playing such a powerful role …children are exposed to all sorts of things..it is bound to affect or influence their imagination..All we can do is give them some time for them to get more comfortable with their imagination.Thank you so much for sharing your experience with your son..it is so insightful 🙂

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  2. Very interesting read. You are quite fearless domestic diva because if a kid will tell me that she can see some shadows I will surely run away from that house, the next moment 😂
    Jokes apart.. This book was always on my list..but due to time constraints I refrained myself from this as psychological thrillers do take up some time even after you finish reading it 😜
    Nice review…looking forward to more posts.

    Like

    1. I know it can be quiet unnerving when your kid is telling you such a thing but believe me with kids it is
      the last thing you would do ..as for the book go ahead it will not take much time to finish at least :);)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. It is true children do go through phases and have imaginary friends, or make up stories to get attention. But for your own piece of mind I would consider a hidden camera or a nanny cam directed at where she said the person she saw in her room was. Tell her you believe her and that next time she sees anyone in her room to come and tell you. You can then play back the video yourself and see that everything is ok and then show her. She will see that it is true and you are protecting her. And she should feel safer and you will as well.

    Liked by 1 person

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